Distraction Is the Opiet Of the Masses.

Music: "Soil, Soil" by Tegan and Sara

Well this is me being distracted when I should be studying for my Sociology exam tomorrow. The class focuses on Sex and Gender and it should be easy enough but I haven't really touched my notes yet. That is not good. My brain just keeps rejecting me. It's like "You want to study? Yeah? That's funny." And then proceedes to stick its tongue out at me. Technically I just have this exam and then the paper to make the class officially an honors option and then I am done!!

I took one exam today and it was in Spanish. I'm embarassed to say I am taking spanish but I did. I do know how to speak it fine. I can speak it fine with my family and understand what they say back to me...however I am terrible at writing it. And grammar always finds a way to come back and bite me in the ass. Yes I said bite. It bites hard and often leaves rabies and scars. I am Mexican, through and through, and my family still holds close ties with all of the traditions. I'm hoping that I'll be excused for taking these classes for trying to get better since Spanish was not my first language, and English majors are required to have up to two years of Spanish. I luckily, am done now since I tested pretty far ahead. In general I think I'll be alright grade-wise. The problem is when colleges--or any school for that matter--teaches you Spanish they always teach you Spanish as spoken in Spain. Believe it or not it is so different from Spanish in Mexico. It's like trying to teach someone English but they way they speak it in England rather than the Engilsh in the U.S. It's crazy how it goes sometimes.

Speaking of England I was accepted to study literature in London. I need to get that paperwork in before I go on break but I might not do that till tomorrow. I'm excited and nervous at the same time. I've never been really far away from my family and out of reach of anyone I know. This will certainly be an experience. I have been to London before so hopefully that will prove beneficial to me than if I was going away cold.

I just realize I've never explained why I named my blog the way I did. *fails.* It is called 'Dancing on the Edge' because my mother said that to me a few years back. The way I live life and treat life I've always been on the edge of things. When I was little I was always on the edge of life and death. When I was away from the mess and with normal friends and family members, I was always on the edges of different social 'cliques' and on the edge between childhood and being and adult. Now I'm still on the edge but it's a bit unclear. Things always are foggy when you're in the middle of them. You never truly know why things happen to you, why you meet the people you do, until you are older and far away from the situation at hand. The 'mirror, mirror' line is from a book I am currently working on. It's entitled, Mirror Images.

Which, speaking of Mirror Images, I have decided to run away and hide for a weekend. I need to finish the book. I knowh the different steps of getting published...I just need to actually follow through and try for once. I'm always second guessing myself and worried that no one will want to read what I write. It didn't help when my Intro to Fiction wirting prof. ripped into fantasy novelists and how stupid/terrible they were. Brilliant. I need a mentor...bad. Learning to write via novels can only take a girl so far.

Food. iYo tengo mucho hambre! Y...I need to study. XP

Hasta luego,
Alejandra

(PS) I intend to do two types of entires everyday. One that is simply on life and the things happening around me during the day. Another on simple musings.

"I feel like a fool
So I'm going to stop troubling you
Buried in my yard
A letter to send to you
And if I forget
Or god forbid die too soon
Hope that you'll hear me
And know that I wrote to you"
~from: "Soil, Soil" by Tegan and Sara (Album: The Con)